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Tires so bald you can see the air in them. As much sense as a slowly-stewed rhubarb stalk. As much sense as a submarine with screen doors. Funnier than a rubber crutch. Finer than frogs hair, split three ways and sanded! A World’s Fair load of logs! Self-invented, because of a town in Michigan’s UP sent a load of logs to a world’s fair.

Dating Funny Quotes And Sayings. QuotesGram

Let funny Confucius quotes, jokes and sayings spice up your day Baseball is wrong – man with four balls cannot walk. Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag. A man with his hands in pockets feels foolish, but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts. Man who lay woman on ground gets piece on earth. Man who read woman like book, prefer braille!

Funny Sayings About Rednecks. There are literally hundreds of redneck sayings out there, and most of them are funny. The following sayings are sorted into .

If you don’t keep busy, it’s all over. I found out that from people much older than me. When I get up in the morning with aches and pains, I don’t let it control me. When you sit down and don’t do anything, you are going to disintegrate. Well, you’re going to disintegrate anyway, but you’ll do it quicker. Future investment earnings and interest and inflation rates are not known to anybody. However, I can guarantee you one thing. This book covers why to stay engaged and happy

Funny sayings about women

Funny joke on married couple A married couple come to the marriage counselor. I love you too. A girl tells her boyfriend: Funny relationship jokes – Pregnancy A lot of things have changed in my life since I got to know that my girlfriend got pregnant. My name, living address, phone number

Funny sayings about dating – How to get a good woman. It is not easy for women to find a good man, and to be honest it is not easy for a man to find a good woman. Want to meet eligible single woman who share your zest for life? Indeed, for those who’ve tried and failed to find the right man offline, internet dating can provide.

Robert Oppenheimer It is always wise to look ahead, but difficult to look further than you can see. To confirm your subscription, you must click on a link in the email being sent to you. Each email contains an unsubscribe link. A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions.

The truly wise person is colorblind. The wise ones understand that they know nothing – for virtually none of our experience is truly factual – and they graciously honor all other opinions. Milne Winnie-The-Pooh It is a wise father that knows his own child.

TOP funniest one-liners, quotes and jokes on the internet! Part 1

Solid Advice on Marriage from Kids “Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don’t have to give her back to her parents. He says to her, “I’ll take you for a whole life, or at least until we have kids and get divorced, but you got to do one particular thing for me. She can’t wait to find out.

Love Sayings for Your Woman Most romantic lines you find to say to a girl are going to sound corny when reading them online. If you were reading them with your buddies, all of you would laugh.

I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic. Never feed your cat anything that doesn’t match the carpet. You know when people see a cat’s litter box, they always say, “Oh, have you got a cat? No fur, no paws, no tail. They run away from mice.

Good Quotations by Famous People

Wedding Anniversary is the day on which two people celebrated their love and promises each other to be in a relationship for a long time. This day is being celebrated by the husband and wife in the very special way and they promise each other that they will continue celebrating their anniversary till the last breath of their life. There are different traditions or way to celebrate anniversary in different parts of the world.

Wedding Anniversary quotes are a poignant and eloquent reminder that in marriage we are greater than the sum of our parts. Marriage is a so special thing to a person who get involve in it and make sweet memories with their partner. Wedding Anniversary is the time when people look back to their sweet memories that they spent together.

Offers the best funny love quotes to make you laugh.

Dollies and tea sets and dress-up hats, Toy trucks, bugs, and baseball bats, Will baby be a boy or a girl so fair? Either way, this is joy we want you to share. Gathering of Women Mothers and grandmothers and aunts and friends, Sisters and nieces and love to no end – Come shower this new mommy with wisdom lifelong, And show her she’s capable, caring, and strong. Simple Baby Shower Sayings Sometimes, you only need a few words to express how your really feel.

Short sentiments are perfect for writing in cards or attaching as favor tags. If you’d like to keep it short and sweet, try one of these simple sayings: Messier, louder, sweeter, softer, and more loveable than you could ever imagine. A special verse or saying can help inspire them to share their wisdom and experience about parenting. To use these sayings, print the words at the top of plain pieces of cardstock.

Then leave a pen near the cards so guests can offer important insights about being a mom. Wisdom and Experience You’ve been there time and time again:

5 Dating Conventions That Women Killed – Return Of Kings

More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in air crashes. Every citizen of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath once a year. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver and purple.

We don’t really love Monday cuz it’s first day and you really don’t want to go out work after having casual weekend, so here’s few Monday funny memes which surely reflects our love for Monday.

These quotes are samples dating back several hundred years to those current. Enjoy these, no matter what your background may be…. I take it everywhere with me. They refuse to be English. I can sit and look at it for hours. Take it or leave it. May they never meet! Everyone says you’re important and nice, but you take second place all the same. Patrick’s Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. It’s ridiculous to suggest we are involved with fascists. All my best friends are black, gay, Irish or criminals.

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Forgive your enemy, but remember his name. Funny sayings – Help in trouble Help a woman when she is in trouble and she will remember you when she will be in trouble again. Funny sayings – Alive Many people are alive only because its illegal to shoot them.

Three old ladies are sitting around a table playing bridge and bragging about their sons. “My Freddie,” said Margaret, “Everyone should be so lucky to have a son like my Freddie.

See menu at bottom of page. Life is too short to take everything dead serious. Weddings are joyous occasions — time to have some fun! Funny Wedding Greetings Being married is like any other job; it helps if you like your boss. Let the fighting commence! It only seems longer.

Funny Love Quotes


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